This One is For Coya...
Coya--I love you.
Choke
It takes her again
wraps stiff fingers around her throat
chokes her until the tears run
burning channels into her cheeks
reopening half healed runnels
coffin-nails have left on her face
she calls me gasping
why
too much
too many
why her
why him
why them
bang bang
they found him in a lake
they found her in a ditch
he was murdered
she was murdered
why
why
why
the violence overshadowed by
the mist that leadens her voice
sodden from her throat
she exhales between her questions
I don't have the answers she needs
the ones she deserves
can't loosen the grip of too much time
cut short
wrapping around her throat
can't breathe enough for her
can feel the damp
as it pours out of my phone
fills my mouth
runs out of my eyes
mother-brother-aunt-cousin
two killed
unsolved crimes
two taken too early
all died
this year and last year
too few years between them
too little time for healing
while prayers and prairie dirt fills the holes
they left behind
We've sat up nights talking
trying to make sense
of senselessness
of grief
of acceptance with no understanding
while the reaper keeps reaping
scything
through native lives
her life
cutting
cold voice laughing
hollow
like lines dug in her face
hollow
echoing
empty
open wounds festering
fearing that she might use alcohol to sterilize
knowing its ability to cauterize
too far away
too far away
to fly to her
pry death away
breathe for her when she can't
pray for her when she can't
promise her what I can't
that it is over
that it won't continue
when I can still her the laughing
and the scything of the reaper.
-Brandon Lacy Campos
-Minneapolis, MN
-September 4, 2006
Brandon, nice poem! :)
Posted by: Poet | September 10, 2006 12:04 AM
B- you are my family. Thank you for this. I trust you to know the pain that I am enduring. The loss and sadness threatens to overwhelm me somedays but I know that Gabe and Vicki's life would matter less if I gave up. I have to keep moving forward, for them, for Vicki's children, I have to continue to build a world that their children can live and thrive. I carry them with me everyday, and in all the work I do. Thank you for these words, it makes me feel less lonely in my grief.
Posted by: coya | September 12, 2006 03:04 AM