Rest in Peace Nelly...

I just received the bad news that a person that I went through treatment with has died. Cirrhosis of the liver around Thanksgiving. Nelly was a Yale Phd in neuroscience that came to Minnesota for alcoholism treatment. I remember the night that I met Nelly. I was probably in my second or third week of treatment. I was telling a story to another of the "inmates" about a book I'd red that talked about the socio-political and scientific history of potatos, apples, marijuana, and tulips. I was sharing that I was pretty damn astounded that the genetic variety present in a single appleseed is so diverse that it is impossible to grow a particular type of apple from a seed. If you plant a Granny Smith the apple that grows will most likely in no way resemble a Granny Smith. I also found out there are huge apple tree forests in Kazakhstan.  Anyway. I was sharing this interesting but useless information with someone else, and Nelly commented that he was impressed at the way I was able to translate the information clearly and succinctly...he was an professor at a medical college in Chi-town...so I took that as a compliment.

When I met Nelly he was still called Mike. He was a large man of the bear variety with a super gay hair do. Generally he was fairly academic with a decent sense of humor...although super touchy at times. One day, during a group session, he did something uber gay...someone in the group called him Nelly...and it stuck. From that day until the day he died...anyone that knew him from his time at Pride called him Nelly.

Nelly and I had our ups and downs. I remember one particular flare up when I let him have it. We were like to tom cats spraying piss on each other for days. But, in the end, we worked it out. He was a good man. And hilarious...truly hilarious. He showed up to someone or another's graduation with a faux black veil. When it came to be his turn to acknowledge the person graduating...he pulled out the veil and began to wail. He was instantly transformed into a grieving Sicilian widow.  I almost had a Depends moment I was laughing so hard. That's real comedy...the kind that almost moves the crowd to incontinence.

Nelly was a good man. God always takes everyone in his own time...but in our time it was much much much too soon. He was strong. He'd kicked a meth habit three years before he entered treatment for alcoholism. He was brilliant by all accounts. They just don't hand out doctorates from Yale in neuroscience at fruit stands at the farmer's market. He could be a bitch...but he was always loyal...always caring...and always good for a good laugh.